Thursday August 20, 2015
The man cave is a space—in the basement, garage, or somewhere that the “She” of the house allows—where a guy can be a guy. He doesn’t need coasters under his drink. He has total control over the remote. And he can eat what he wants without being reminded of his diet. He can yell at the television screen all he wants, play video games uninterrupted (theoretically), and escape the daily grind.
Women don’t understand some of the things that men want to display. They might not share the passion for sports and martial arts movies. And they probably find watching hunting and fishing shows and poker tournaments about as exciting as, well, listening about them.
But here’s the thing, ladies. Everyone needs a place to call their own, a room where they can be undisturbed. A woman might enjoy less isolation, as long as she has quiet time—reading a book by a sunny window, creating in a craft space, or relaxing with a cup of coffee on the patio. As long as she can be willfully ignored by the rest of the family, the woman of the house doesn’t need doors.
A man does.
A woman multi-tasks. A man doesn’t. So, give the guy a break—and a man cave. Here are some things you can add to his new haven, so that you enhance it without making it frilly.
Don’t say “décor”. While a man wants his man cave to look a certain way, he associates “décor” with women’s stuff. As soon as you use this word, you invade his sense of man space.
Don’t waste your energy on curtains. They don’t care what’s on the windows. Keep it simple—a fabric panel with his favorite team’s logo, window decal, or just a simple curtain with grommets that’s easy to open and close.
Let him decide where things go. As much as you might want to organize everything for him, don’t. He’s going to move things around anyway.
Toss pillows will live up to their name. While you might like pretty toss pillows, anything in the man cave will likely end up on the floor, under someone’s feet, or in some other place that will get them dirty.
Use man scents. If you want to add fragrance to the room, choose something manly. Plug-in air fresheners are best, because a man probably won’t light candles—and he definitely won’t remember to blow them out when he leaves the man cave.
Be the stocker, not a stalker. If you want to help, sneak in there and leave a bowl of snacks, preferably individually wrapped so they don’t go stale as quickly.
Bite your tongue. This is a man cave, not a family room. The primary user gets to decide how it looks, how it will be used, and when it can be entered. Ladies, keep the door and your mouth closed. On the plus side, you don’t need to clean it!
If you have a man cave, what are the rules? And what is your favorite man cave feature?